


Invisible Smoke

by pandorabox82



Category: Holby City
Genre: Character Death Fix, F/F, Fix-It
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-06
Updated: 2020-02-04
Packaged: 2020-10-11 07:01:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,906
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20542028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pandorabox82/pseuds/pandorabox82
Summary: Serena and Cameron both have questions about the story that Alex was telling them. Unable to get a straight answer from her, they head to Somalia to find out the truth of what happened, and bring some closure to their lives. What they find there challenges them, but will ultimately lead to the happy family ending they always wanted.





	1. Chapter 1

Serena felt uncomfortably out of place in the church that Marcus had chosen for Bernie's funeral. The venue was the complete opposite of who Bernie was, and she tried hard to fight down the urge to frown or yell or otherwise be a nuisance. After all, Marcus hadn't wanted her to be there in the first place, and it had taken Cameron and Charlotte strong-arming him to get him to relent. Still, she had put on her best suit and blouse, applied enough makeup to make certain that no one would see how pale her face was, nor the dark circles beneath her eyes, and tried to hold her head high as she was shown by Cameron to a spot in the very last pew, as if Marcus considered her to be beneath even sitting in close proximity to the family.

"I'm so sorry, Serena. If it were up to me, you'd be sitting with us. Charlie doesn't think it's fair, either, but we hope that you don't take it as a reflection on us."

"I completely understand, Cameron. And if there's not a wake afterwards, perhaps we could go out for a meal and drinks?"

"I like that idea better than following Dad back home. I'll convince Charlie to come with us, too. You were more important to Mum at the end." He grimaced a little and Serena nodded, reaching out to squeeze his upper arm lightly. "I need to get up there, Serena. We'll see you in a little bit."

She nodded and watched him head to the front of the small church, giving his father a small glare before taking a seat next to his sister, slinging his arm around her shoulders and visibly scooting away from their father as a minister approached the dais and the organist finished the song she was playing. To her shame, Serena found herself thinking about her time with Bernie, how much she had loved her, and how things had ended over a selfish, stupid, thing she had done. She thought about how her heart had broke the moment Bernie had stepped out of the doorway at Albie's, and she knew that she still loved the woman deeply. So deeply that she knew that this entire thing was a farce. There was no way that Alex was right, that Bernie was truly gone. There was no body, there never had been one found, just some body armour that supposedly belonged to Bernie, and only one military official coming to the hospital to inform Cameron that his mother was missing. They hadn't even bothered to send another official to inform them of the fact that Bernie had been declared missing, presumed dead. And Alex hadn't helped matters by informing Serena that Bernie had been engaged to her.

Her lower lip wobbled a little as quick tears came to her eyes. Still, she refused to cry, not in public, not when people who didn't understand her relationship with Bernie, or how she could still be in love with her, even after everything that had transpired between them. "Dammit," she whispered as two tears slipped out of her eye, and Serena reached up as surreptitiously as she could to brush them away without ruining her makeup.

Finally, the farce of a funeral came to an end, and Serena slipped out of the church to dart around to the side of the building, pulling out the pack of cigarettes she had broken down and bought before coming there. She hadn't bought a lighter, as if she knew that she shouldn't go through with the act of smoking one, but still, she wanted to have a physical reminder of Bernie in her hands. "I have a light, if you want?"

She looked up to see Charlotte standing there, a blank look on her face. "I don't really want to smoke these, it's just…"

"Mum smoked that brand, and you wanted to feel closer to her. I get it. I don't smoke often, but I picked up a pack of those the day Cameron called to inform me that Mum was missing."

Serena nodded as she slipped the cigarettes back into her purse before holding out her hand to the young woman. Charlotte shook her head before closing the distance between them and hugging her tightly. "I miss her so much, Charlotte."

"I can only imagine. Cameron told me that you were devastated when Alex waltzed into the hospital and declared herself as Mum's one true love. I hope you know that that is the furthest thing from the truth. Mum considered you to be the great love of her life."

She rubbed her lips together as Cameron ambled over towards them, that same flat look on his face as had been on Charlotte's, and she welcomed him over to her side, holding up her other arm. It wasn't surprising when he stepped close, allowing her to close her arm around his shoulders as well. Though they couldn't replace her sweet Elinor, they were Bernie's children, which made them an extension of her family. "And I think that she was the great love of my life. I just made so many mistakes, and now I don't have to opportunity to make it right."

Swallowing thickly, Serena once more tried to keep her emotions locked under control, knowing that there were still people there that she knew would judge her. "Let's head over to Albie's before we get roped into going home with Dad. That's the last thing that I want," Cameron said as he took hold of Serena's hand and tugged her over towards her car. Charlotte tripped along behind them, and then they were waiting on her to unlock the doors so they could climb in. Serena let out a long breath as she dug her keys out of her purse and let them in before she climbed behind the wheel.

"I'll be picking up the tab today. It's the least I can do," she said as she pulled into a parking space behind the pub. It didn't seem to be too busy yet, but that could change, and she wondered if she would see any of her colleagues there. Part of her hoped not, since she didn't want to see anyone in that moment, instead wanting to focus on Cameron and Charlotte and what they needed in that moment. "You know what I prefer to drink, Cam. Have the bartender start a tab for me while Charlotte and I find a place to sit down."

He nodded and went over to the bar and she gave him a tiny smile as she led Charlotte over to one of the more secluded booths in the back of the pub. "Do you think that we could get food, too? I didn't have the heart to eat earlier, but I don't want to drink too much on an empty stomach," the girl murmured as she took a seat next to Serena, leaving Cameron to sit across from them.

"Of course, we can do whatever you want, darling."

Charlotte smiled shakily at her and she picked up the menu to peruse it as Serena settled back into the bench seat. "I think I'll go up and order one of everything that sounds good to me, and I will definitely pay you back…"

"No, Charlotte, I have today, no matter the cost. Because I know that that's what Bernie would do for Jason and Greta, if it had been me." She nodded before leaning over and hugging Serena tightly and then joining her brother in line. As Serena waited for them to come back, she pulled out her phone and scrolled through the pictures she had of Bernie. Every one of them made her feel more and more heartsick, and she tried not to dwell on the fact that she would never be seeing Bernie's smile in person again. She would never feel her arms wrapped around her waist as she spooned her in bed. She would never have some of the best conversations she had ever had in her life again. There were so many things that she was going to miss about her Bernie, but the ability to just talk and be understood would probably be the largest hole in her life. Swiping at her eyes, she took a few deep breaths to try and calm her heart before Bernie's children returned to her.

"The bartender said that he'd space out the food, so that things won't get cold," Charlotte said as she slid in next to Serena once more, nudging her shoulder lightly as she looked down at the picture Serena was staring at. "I don't think I've ever seen that picture of you two before, Serena."

"Your mum was learning how to take selfies, and she wanted to practice," Serena replied softly, before turning the phone so that Cameron could see. He grinned sadly, to which she nodded in agreement before slipping the phone back into her purse.

"Mum isn't dead. I don't feel like she's dead. And I know so many people say that, but there were just so many inconsistencies in Alex's story that I just can't feel comfortable with burying her memory, since there was no body. I don't understand why everyone else can just accept it so quickly, like she never really existed. I don't understand how people are so quick to move on!"

Serena nodded again, picking up her glass of shiraz and taking a long sip as she thought about what to say. "I feel the say way, Cameron. There are so many holes in the story that Alex tried to feed to us that there has to be more going on than the story that's being pushed on us. But they'll label us as mad if we talk about that to anyone else. And what else can we do, but hope that Bernie turns up someday and walks back into our lives?"

"We could go searching for her."

That idea appealed to Serena immensely, but she didn't think that she should let on that that was exactly what she wanted to do. "Neither of us can afford to take time off, and I don't want to get my hopes up just to have them dashed once more. I'm sorry."

"No, I get it, it's a pipe dream, but I still wish that we could leave everything behind, the three of us, and head to Somali and find out what really happened." Cameron's smile wobbled a little before he picked up his beer and gulped at it, putting some space between them as a tender silence fell over the table. And all Serena could do was focus on the idea of leaving everything behind and tracking down the truth.


	2. Chapter 2

Serena felt like she was going through the motions throughout her entire shift, since the only thing she could think about was the fact that there was going to be a memorial for Bernie in just a few short hours. This was yet another event that she wasn't prepared for, and everyone seemed to be able to read her discomfort, though no one really wanted to say anything to her about it. Even Ric was dancing around the subject, as if he thought by saying something she might burst into uncontrollable sobs. No one knew that she had no more sobs left in her heart, just weak little cries, as if her body had turned into the Sahara due to all the grief she had experienced in the last two years.

Finally, it came time to head outside and she wrapped her jacket around herself, finding the day unseasonably cool. Or maybe her heart was just frozen solid, having used up all the warmth she had had that morning in getting Cameron to agree to allow Alex to come to the memorial, even after the little bombshell she had dropped about being engaged to Bernie. From the look on Cameron's face, he had wanted to strike her for that statement, and it had taken everything in Serena to not make a face as she cooled both of them down.

"Are you ready to head out there, Ms Campbell?"

Looking up at Dom, she nodded slowly, pulling herself out of her woolgathering as she tried to think about the time ahead of her and not break down in front of the young man. "Thank you for helping my pull this memorial together. I know that you were very close to Bernie, and your friendship meant a lot to her."

His eyes swam with tears, and she had to look away before she started to cry in sympathy. There would be a time for that later, not in front of him, after all. "And she loved you very much, Serena. No matter what anyone else who came her might say, I know that you were the one for her. We all make mistakes, and I am just so lucky that I still have Lofty here to forgive and make a happier future with. I wish that things had turned out differently. I know that the two of you could have worked through anything that the world threw at you."

"Yes, well, I wasn't able to resist a little piece of fluff, and that derailed the best relationship to ever fall into my life. She was my best friend before she was anything else, and I miss that most of all."

Dom nodded as he reached out and squeezed her shoulder softly. "I completely understand." They drew in simultaneous shaky breaths, and then they were making their way outside. Once there, Dom took charge of the situation, organizing the people as she looked around for Cameron. She had heard through the grapevine that he had had a tough day at work, that he had shown up more than a little drunk, but still trying to work his shift. It was a shame, but she understood trying to drink away the pain of it all. She had tried to do the same when her mother had passed, after all. "Where's Cam? He should be here, since he has to give the speech. Here, you take the poem and read it while I search for him."

Dom pressed a distressed piece of paper into her hand before hurrying back into the building, and she looked down at the paper in shock, not quite certain of what she was supposed to do with it. She had never been one for reading poetry, that was her mother's realm, and she let out a shaky breath as she approached the lectern and cleared her throat. "Well, I want to thank you all for coming out to honor the memory of one of the finest surgeons that has ever graced Holby City Hospital with their presence. I, I've been asked to read a poem that Dominic Copeland, one of Bernie's best friends, chose for her. You'll have to forgive me, I've never had the ear for poetry, so I just might butcher this." Once more, she cleared her throat and began to read the Dickinson poem, the syllables and patterns sounding janky to her ears, even as the beautiful words fell flat from her lips.

Looking up, she saw that Dom had managed to find Cameron, leading him up to the front row, his eyes looking so disappointed and sad to her. Wrapping up the poem, she gestured towards Cameron, only to have him shake his head furiously, shoving a sheaf of papers into Dom's hand before staring down at the ground, a slightly green tinge to his skin. Serena let out a deep sigh as she stepped down and took a seat next to him, reaching out to squeeze his knee as she listened to Dom read the words that he had written. In the middle of the tribute, Cameron began to sob, and she hurriedly wrapped an arm around his shoulders, pulling him close as Dom finished up and then invited the people to enjoy the refreshments that the hospital had provided.

Henrik and Alex were the first people she saw as she turned towards the refreshment table, and she tried not to frown at them, since she didn't want to offend Henrik. Taking a deep breath, she strode over to their sides, fighting the urge to shake Alex's hand off her shoulder as she stopped in front of them. "It was a good turnout, Serena. I think that Bernie would have been pleased to see how fondly she was remembered," he said, giving her one of those patented subtle smiles that said so much. She nodded and then darted her eyes to look at Alex, seeing that she was giving her a decidedly weird look. "I have to get back now, but anytime that you need to talk, my door is open to you."

"Thank you, Henrik," she said lowly before he turned and made his way back into the hospital. "What do you want?" she faintly hissed once he was out of earshot, and Alex blanched a little as she recoiled away from her, though she still didn't remove her hand from Serena's shoulder.

"I thought that you might want to head out for a drink, to reminisce about Bernie for a while. There are things that only we can share about her, after all."

Serena felt her brow furrow together as she mulled Alex's words over in her head. Though she didn't want to spend any more time than necessary in her presence, there might be the opportunity to get more information out of her as to what happened in Somalia. That seemed to outweigh her misgivings, and she gave a sharp nod before turning on her heel and marching over to her car. Cameron gave them an odd look, and she shook her head at him, trying to let him know with a look that everything was all right, and that she had things under control. That feeling quickly fled once they were inside her car and Alex was giving her that strange, earnest, look once more. Serena could feel the tension inside the vehicle build as the silence between them grew oppressive and then Alex was clearing her throat. Serena looked up into her eyes and felt a frisson of aversion run down her spine, even as the other woman started to lean forward. Before she knew what was happening, the woman was puckering her lips, and it was only at the last second that Serena turned her face so that she kissed her cheek instead.

"What do you think you're doing?" she asked, sounding close to tears. Which, inexplicably, she was. Alex's eyes widened as she pulled away quickly, guilt settling over her features, as if she had thought that Serena would have welcomed the kiss, and in that moment, Serena's feelings of unease solidified. There was more to the story that Alex had told her and Cameron, something that she didn't want known, and it didn't matter what else the woman might say, she knew that there would be no way she would ever stop looking for her Bernie, because they were right. She was alive, someone had taken her, or misidentified her, or something, but she was not about to be strong armed by Alex into believing a convenient lie that fell from her lips.

"I just wanted to comfort you, Serena. That's what friends do, after all."

Friends. That was a bit rich, though Serena chose not to comment on it, since there was still the chance that she might find out more once liquor had loosened Alex's tongue. "That's kind of you, but I'd rather not." Alex nodded as she settled back in her seat, and then she turned the car on and pulled out of her spot, choosing to head to a pub far away from the hospital, since she didn't want anyone getting ideas that she had quickly thrown Bernie over for her ex. And she prayed to whatever energy might be listening that she was about to take one step closer to finding out the truth.


	3. Chapter 3

"I just don't know what to do, Fleur. She honestly thought that I would be receptive to being kissed by her!"

"That is a little creepy, I must admit. So, what are you going to do about it?"

"Honestly? I'm thinking that Cam's idea of storming Somalia and turning over every stone until we find Bernie is starting to sound better and better. God knows that my attention is shite right now, though it hasn't affected my surgical skills as of yet. But I know that I am going to be more distracted the longer I think about this situation. I didn't want to let her into my head, but that is completely what happened."

Fleur nodded in sympathy as a commotion caught their attention. Looking up, Serena saw that Cameron was arguing with Ric and Donna, and she groaned a little before looking at Fleur. "You should probably go and see what was going on."

Serena let out another groan as she gave Fleur a sharp nod. "I cannot even begin to think what the problem is now. I know that we've both had a hard time coping, but there's only so much rope that he will be given before he'll be out on his ear. He was already kicked back down to my ward, though I don't blame him after what Kian did. Anyway, we'll catch up soon, I promise."

"And if you head to Africa, let me know! I can hold down the fort here for you."

Serena gave her a warm smile as she got up and crossed over to where the group was. "What is going on here?" she demanded as she glared at Cameron, smelling the alcohol that was rolling off his breath in waves. "You smell like a distillery, Cam! Do you truly think this is what your mother would want from you?"

His face fell as he lowered his head and shook it a few times. "No," he finally croaked out, and she let out a deep sigh as she reached out her hand. He stepped forward and let his head thump down on her shoulder, a move that reminded her very much of Bernie, and it was a struggle to not cry, to not let on that she was despondent at that move. She had to be tough, to let him know that this was completely inappropriate behavior from him, and that there would likely be consequences from today. That idea was scrapped when Henrik stepped out of the lift and gave her an almost disappointed look. She shook her head a little, knowing that the reckoning was going to come sooner rather than later.

"Doctor Dunn, Ms Campbell, I believe that we need to have a little discussion in my office." There was a gravity to his voice that she could not ignore, and she drew in a deep breath as she gave him a small nod. "If you'd follow after me, then."

Gently, she pushed Cameron away from her and then followed after Henrik, Cameron at her heels. The ride up to his office was uncomfortably quiet, and she tried to come up with something to say to break the silence, to make things be a little more comfortable between them so that it wouldn't turn into another shouting match once they were behind the safety of Henrik's office door. Still, nothing came to mind, and then she was once more following Henrik down the hall, wondering what the first words out of his lips would be. The door closed loudly behind Henrik, and as they stood in front of his desk, Serena again couldn't help but be reminded of the time when Bernie and she had been in that same position. "Henrik…"

"Please, take a seat, both of you. I am the only one who looms in this hospital."

The use of a joke, no matter how subtle it was, set Serena at ease, and she did as asked, watching Cameron follow her lead from the corner of her eye. "Mister Hanssen," Cameron started, only to be cut off with a quick wave of Henrik's hand.

"Would either of you care for something to drink? I know that I pulled you away from your break with Fleur, Serena."

"Some water might be nice. For both of us."

Henrik nodded as he went over to the closet in his office. Serena listened to him rummage around before he rejoined them, taking a seat behind his desk before handing over the bottles and watching them intently. She felt like she was under intense scrutiny, and knew that she wouldn't feel better until he asked the questions that were surely on his mind. Cameron cracked open his bottle, and she glanced over to see that his face had completely drained of colour, though little beads of nervous sweat had started to form at his hairline. Reaching out, she patted his arm lightly before opening her own bottle and taking a small sip from it before focusing back on Henrik and awaiting what he had to say.

"I believe that we finally have to address the invisible smoke in the room," he said as he glanced between both of them. Serena pursed her lips to realise that she was being included in with this whole fiasco, and her eyes narrowed a little as she stared at him. "Yes, I have been watching you as well, Serena. No matter what you try to say, Bernie's absence is affecting both of your deeply, and as it is now affecting both of your performances here."

"I just can't seem to get into the right track here, Mister Hanssen," Cam said before he took a sip of water. "I just miss my mother, and I want to go searching for…I don't even know anymore. Perhaps closure?"

"Closure is a very good thing to have, Mister Dunn. Perhaps you could find that while taking a bit of compassionate leave? I am also extending the same offer to you as well, Serena."

She looked over, meeting Cameron's gaze, and saw that he appeared to want her to agree first, so that he didn't look weak by doing so. "I believe that would be for the best, Henrik. Cameron and I would really appreciate having a few weeks to get our affairs in order. I hope that this won't reflect poorly on Cameron's record, since grief can make us react differently than we would in a normal situation."

"Certainly, Serena. However, I will have to make a note of it in his file, though it will not be a formal reprimand. Take head, Doctor Dunn, that should this happen again, once you have returned from leave, I will be unable to be quite so lenient."

"I understand, Mister Hanssen, thank you."

He nodded and threaded his fingers together as he looked at them. "I did not have the opportunity to speak at Bernie's memorial, however I did want to let both of you know that I always regarded her in the highest degree. Her skills as a trauma surgeon were beyond parallel, and if I had been in control of the board, rather than Ms Kartik, I would have ensured that there was adequate funding to keep the trauma ward running. I always regretted losing her to Nairobi, and then Mogadishu, but at least the people in need there were able to have access to someone as skilled as Ms Wolfe."

Serena felt herself tearing up, and Henrik must have read that in her look as he handed over a box of tissues, allowing her to take a few and dab at her eyes without comment. "And I know that she always respected you, Mister Hanssen. Even though you two did have a few occasions where you didn't quite see eye to eye."

"If everyone agreed all of the time, the world would be a boring place where nothing new occurred. I am quite content to know that we had our disagreements, and I hope that those quarrels were enough to help sharpen our thoughts and change our perspectives. Now, I don't want it to appear that I am disciplining you by sending you both home now, but I feel that it would be better if your compassionate leave began as soon as possible. Serena, would you make certain that Doctor Dunn arrives home safely?"

"Certainly, Henrik. Come along, Cam." She got to her feet and went over to the door, waiting for him to join her. It didn't take long, and then they were headed for the lifts once more.

"So, what are we going to do now?" he asked a bit forlornly as they stepped inside the lift, and she gave him a small smirk. "Serena?"

"We're going to do what you wanted to do from the very beginning. We're going to Somalia and we are tracking down the people who knew your mother there, and we will find out exactly what happened to her. And if the truth truly is that she passed, and they couldn't find any part of her amidst the rubble, then we'll have to believe what they say. However, I have the feeling that Alex was keeping something from us, and that we are duty bound to figure out what that is. I can't do it alone, and I'm hoping that your sister will also agree to come with us. I think that it would be a good bonding experience for us. What do you say?"

"When do we leave?" And for the first time in a matter a weeks, a true smile spread across his face and Serena knew that this was precisely what they all needed to help heal the wound of Bernie's disappearance from their lives.


	4. Chapter 4

Serena sighed as she looked at the luggage that was in her front hall. Since it wasn't a pleasure trip, she had tried to pare down what clothing she would need. Knowing enough to do a quick internet search to make certain that she would not be attracting undue attention with her attire, she had made certain to include as many of her modest blouses as possible, managing to keep everything down to one small suitcase. Cameron, on the other hand, had brought along a monstrosity of a suitcase, and she tried not to let her frustration show.

"I had really hoped that Charlotte would have been able to get time off work so that she could accompany us tomorrow, but I understand how difficult it can be to arrange something at late notice," she said as she stepped around their luggage to head into the kitchen where Cameron was setting the table. Jason and Greta were coming over to help see them off, and she didn't want to miss a moment with her adorable great niece.

"Yeah, well, she seems able to cope with missing Mum much better than I could, so she didn't need to have compassionate leave." There was a slightly bitter tone in his voice, and Serena sighed as she crossed over to his side and rested her hand on his shoulder. "What?"

"We all handle grief in different ways, Cam. When I lost Elinor, I was even more bitter than you are now, and it didn't help me any. In fact, I was surprised when your mother stayed by my side to see me through that time of lies and acrimony. I loved her, and I couldn't stand myself, so I tried my best to push her away. She pushed right back, and for a time we were stronger for it." Pursing her lips a little, she drew in a deep breath through her nose as she struggled to keep her emotions in check.

"I remember Mum telling me a little bit about how deep your grief was. I wish that I had been here to help, too. I know that Elinor didn't quite get on with me as well as you would have liked, but she was a kind soul."

Serena nodded, about to reply when the doorbell rang. Taking a quick glance at her watch, she saw that it was much too early to be Jason, since punctuality was his hallmark, and she wondered who it could be. "I'll be right back."

Cameron nodded before leaning forward and hugging her tightly. "You are so good to us," he murmured in her ear before letting go and returning to getting the table prepared for their meal.

Those were the words that caused her to start crying, and she was swiping at her eyes as she went to the door, still trying to figure out who it was that had appeared on her door that evening. Plastering a placid smile on her lips, she took a deep breath before opening the door. To her shock, Charlotte was standing there, a small suitcase in hand, a satchel on her back. "So, I kind of told my job to fuck off, that this was more important, and…now I can come along with you and Cam?"

"Come in!" she exclaimed, a true smile spreading across her lips as she tugged the young woman into the hall. "Were you able to get on the same flight as us?"

Charlotte nodded, dropping her suitcase next to the others there, and shifted how her satchel was sitting as she followed her into the kitchen. "Thankfully, I never cancelled my ticket in the first place, as I was truly hoping that my boss would relent, or that someone would switch shifts with me, so that I would be able to go. But the more I thought about it, the more I knew that I needed to be with you and Cam. We've never really had the chance to be together for an extended period of time, and I want to get to know you better, and see what my mum saw in you."

Serena didn't bother to hide her tears this time, feeling closer than she had ever been to Charlotte in that moment. "I am really going to love having you by our sides, Charlotte." The smile that graced her lips reminded Serena so strongly of Bernie that she let out an audible sigh before stopping and hugging her close. "There doesn't seem to be a way to stop finding reminders of your mother in my life, just like I always found reminders of Elinor."

"I know. I keep thinking I hear her voice in my ear, or my name. You know, there was just that way she said it that made me feel loved. And I know that this will be the longest of long shots, but I am willing to go to the ends of the earth to see if she's still with us. Because I just want to hear her say my name one more time."

Charlotte drew in a long, shaky, breath, and Serena nodded against her shoulder as she embraced her all the tighter, not wanting to let go of her in that moment. "Speaking as a mother, I would give anything to call out Elinor's name in love and have her respond to me."

"Oh, my god, you two. Are you going to be this mushy the entire trip?" She looked over at Cameron, seeing the slightly sad, slightly teasing, expression on his face, knowing that he was trying to inject some levity into the room so that he wouldn't start crying as well.

"It all depends," Charlotte tartly replied as she let go of Serena to quickly stick her tongue out at her brother. "Are you going to be a salty beach the entire trip?"

Serena felt her brow furrow in confusion, even as Cameron tried to stifle the laugh that bubbled up out of his throat. Unable to do so, he burst into a loud guffaw, and Charlotte giggled, too, before reaching out and smacking his shoulder lightly. "You know that's what I'm best at, sometimes," he finally answered once he had gotten control of his laughter.

Knowing that it must be some sort of inside joke, Serena shook her head and took a seat at the table as she waited for Jason and his family to arrive. Charlotte took a seat next to her, while Cameron set the table with an extra setting. "Who all is going to be here?" Charlotte finally asked as she looked around the table to see how many places were set.

"My nephew, Jason, and his wife and daughter. You met him that Christmas we were all together."

"Oh, that's right! He is such a sweet guy, I'm glad that he found someone who makes him happy." Charlotte smiled gently at her as she took the glass of water Cameron handed her, sipping from it slowly as he filled the rest of the glasses. "No wine tonight?"

"We're travelling in the morning, and Serena thought that it would be best if we didn't drink."

"That's right, we need to have clear heads come the morning, especially if we're going to be trying to find Bernie. If we're hungover, or still drunk, when we land, then we're starting off on the wrong foot. It might make me seem a bit old-fashioned, but we're going to be in a different country, with a different culture, on a different continent, and those are enough issues to make me nervous. I don't also need to worry about if I say the wrong thing due to being inebriated."

She shuffled her shoulders a little, wondering how Charlotte would react, since Cameron hadn't seemed to think much of her prudence. Again, it seemed like Charlotte had inherited some of her mother's more reserved, staid, personality traits, as she gave a small nod before smiling at her. "I think that that is a wonderful idea, actually, Cam. Serena's right, we don't want to put our foot into it before we've even really begun our search. We're lucky that someone is thinking straight here."

"Well, I don't always think straight," she replied before she could control her tongue, and a quick flush heated up her cheek as Cameron and Charlotte both began to giggle like school children. "See? That is precisely why I, at least, need to remain sober until we're home. I have little slips like that all the time, and I'm sober now. Imagine what might slip out of my mouth if I were tipsy?"

"Mum did mention that you had the naughtiest tongue in the relationship," Charlotte said, and Serena watched Cameron turn as red in the face as she felt in that moment, and she pursed her lips as she took a few calming breaths. "What?"

"It is amazing how innocent you can be, Charlie, even after all the things you've done and seen," Cameron managed to choke out before he picked up his water glass and took a long swig. The doorbell rang once more, and this time, she knew that it was Jason and his family. She was extremely grateful for the distraction, and hoped that with the addition of her nephew there would be no more embarrassing talk. Though, given the direction their conversations had turned so far that evening, she was almost certain that was not to be, and she tried to prepare herself for some very interesting conversations in the hours ahead.


	5. Chapter 5

Serena groaned a little as their plane touched down in Edinburgh. Though it was only a ninety minute flight, this first leg of the journey had thoroughly worn her out, since they had had to be up at seven to be out the door at eight to catch the train to London. And she was grateful that her father had always drilled being early to the airport into her, since there had been a major line through security that had taken much longer than anticipated, and so they only just made it to their gate with thirty minutes to spare before the doors closed. She hated being that close to time, and so had felt anxious and on edge the entire flight.

That feeling didn't change when they looked at the flight board and saw that they would have to cross the terminal to get to their next gate. Taking a deep breath, Serena tried to stay positive, though that was quickly ebbing as a number of slow walkers kept them from getting to their next gate as quickly as she would have liked. Charlotte seemed to know that she was fast approaching the end of her rope, as she reached out and took hold of her hand, squeezing it tightly as she drifted closer to her. "Everything is going to be fine. EDI isn't that large an airport, and we'll get there. They know we're coming. And just think, once we've taken off from Frankfurt, you can sleep, since it's an overnight flight to Addis Ababa."

She nodded, knowing that Charlotte had the right attitude, and she squeezed her hand as they finally managed to pass the slow walkers and finally reach their gate. As soon as they were in their seats, Serena turned and looked at Charlotte, who was talking quietly to Cameron, and sighed, willing herself to stay awake as the plane took off. They were going to be landing at nine, which gave them almost an hour and a quarter to get to the next gate, and then, blessed sleep. Still, she couldn't stop the wide yawn that split her lips, and she sighed as she rubbed her head back and forth against the back of the seat before closing her eyes and listening to the noise around her.

And then, she was opening her eyes as her eyes popped, telling her that they were landing in Frankfurt. "I wanted to stay awake," she groaned as she sat up straight and cracked her back. "Now I'll never get to sleep on the overnight flight."

"I don't think we'll have to worry about that, Serena. Somehow I have the feeling that you'll get right to sleep as soon as we're aboard," Cameron said as they deplaned, and she shrugged as she adjusted how she was carrying her bag. "Now, why don't you and Charlotte see if there's a short line at the closest coffee shop while I find out where our next gate is."

Serena nodded a little and led Charlotte down the hall. Thankfully, just around the corner there was an open coffee shop, and she was able to get them all something to eat and drink in the time it took Cameron to rejoin them. "All right, where are we headed to now?" she asked as she handed him his cup, and he pointed in the right direction with said cup. She smiled and set off after him, grateful that this gate wasn't too far from their other one, as that allowed them to have time to eat and drink before they started boarding. "How are you two still so chipper?" she asked, rubbing her face with her hands in an effort to try and stay awake until their group was called.

"I'm used to running on adrenaline," Cameron replied. "Working with Jac kept me on my toes, and so I learned to function on as little sleep as possible and still work well. Plus, we're younger, so we can roll with the punches faster. Not that you're old, but…"

"I understand," she said, cutting him off. "And it was more of a rhetorical question, anyway."

"I knew that." He flashed her a quick grin before devouring the pastry she'd bought him. "I am seriously looking forward to sleeping on this leg of the journey, though. My stamina is flagging."

Serena gave him an understanding look as she pulled out her phone and checked her notifications, seeing there was an email from Henrik. Opening it, she smiled as she read about Oskar and how he was getting along being with him. While she knew that there would come a time when Henrik had to give him back to Sara, she hoped that it wouldn't come too soon. Somehow, having that precious little boy in his life was helping to heal the wounds of losing his son, his best friend, and his love in such quick succession.

As she was writing a reply to him, the gate attendant began to announce the beginning of boarding. Thankfully, Serena had decided to pay a little extra for business class on the leg of the flight, since she had wanted to be comfortable while she slept, so they were able to get in line shortly after the announcement. After showing her boarding pass and passport, she started down the jetway, absently tapping out an answer to Henrik as she waited for the small group of first-class passengers seemed to take forever boarding. Finally, though, they were finding their seats and she smiled happily to see that Cameron and Charlotte had switched seats so that they could be together. It was a little thing, but she knew that it would be easier to get to know Charlotte a little better before they inevitably fell asleep.

"So, where will we head first?" Charlotte asked once they were settled in their seats, and Serena smiled tiredly as she fastened her seatbelt. "I'm assuming our hotel, since we don't want to go to the hospital right from the airport. It would be so awkward to carry a suitcase and my satchel with me."

"Yes, I thought that we could head to the hotel and drop our bags off, maybe refresh a little. I made certain to call ahead and request an early check in, since we'll be arriving well before typical check in times." Serena rummaged through her carryon bag and pulled out her tablet, bringing up her book app and opening the current book she was reading. It was nice to try and relax enough to read, since she didn't really take that time to do so when she was home, filling her days with enough busy work to keep her mind from wandering to the fact that she had lost Bernie due to her own stupidity.

"Do you miss Mum as much as I do?"

The question was quiet, and Serena set her tablet aside so that she could look at her, reaching out to caress Charlotte's cheek as she nodded. "I think that I might. It's a different sort of missing, since you're her daughter, and I was her partner, but there's a hole in my heart that seemed to grow larger when Alex informed us of your mother's supposed death. I've bene trying to act positive and believe that Bernie is still alive, but there is a part of me that thinks I'm being foolish and prolonging my sorrow. Because good things haven't happened to me in the last few years, except for your mother. I lost my mother, I lost my daughter, I lost one of my F2s, I lost myself, and then I lost her. Even Jason has pulled away from me since the incident that separated Bernie and me. And I can't help but wonder where in my life I fucked up so badly that I can't seem to find a moment's happiness."

By the end, her voice had fallen into a hoarse whisper, and Charlotte, who was openly crying, reached out to take hold of Serena's hand, squeezing it tightly as she shook her head a little. "Life is a bitch at times, Serena, but you didn't screw things up. It's just life. Sure, there are probably a few decisions that you should have made differently, but all those decisions made you who you are. The kindness that you've shown Cameron and myself following Mum's disappearance, the obvious love you have for Jason and his family, those are not the result of someone who has been so downtrodden in life that things appear hopeless. Instead, they are the reaction of someone who has taken the blows life has given her and still has room for love and compassion in her life. You and Mum deserved to have a long life together. The threads of Fate seemed to pull you apart, however, but I really hope that we can find her and bring her home with us. And once we're home, I know that you're going to work everything out and that you'll find the happiness in life that you both deserve."

Serena gave her a small smile, the motion causing the tears trembling in the corners of her eyes to finally spill down her cheeks. "You have to keep hold of that sweet faith for me, Charlotte. Because while it might be the exhaustion of a full day of travel, I find my hope flagging. I'm trying to keep a brave face on for Cameron, but I feel like I can be honest with you."

"Probably because we're not as close as you and Cam are. And don't worry, I think that it's the exhaustion sapping away your hope. Once you've had a good night's sleep, I think that your outlook will change. So put the tablet away, get out the blanket and curl up in the seat to sleep. That is precisely what I'm going do, after all."

She gave her a little wider smile before bending forward and grabbing the plane provided blanket, unfolding it before snuggling up as best she could while the plane began to taxi and then take off. Once she was able to, Serena reclined her seat marginally, making certain she wasn't in the other person's space, before settling down to sleep, hoping that Charlotte was right and that with a few hours of good sleep her attitude would change.


	6. Chapter 6

The last leg of their journey went off without a hitch, and Serena found herself exhaling with relief when their baggage had come off the carousel without any damage or any piece being missing. The number of connections that they had made had worried her about that, though she was prepared to buy new clothing if that had been a necessity. "All right, let's find our driver."

"Driver?" Cameron asked, looking a bit befuddled.

"Yes. You didn't seriously expect us to try and wrangle a taxi or public transportation when we arrived, did you? There was no way I would feel comfortable navigating that on a full day of airplane travel, so I called ahead and arranged a driver for us during our length of stay. This will be safer for us in the long run, too."

He nodded absently, as if still trying to wrap his mind around the fact that she had planned so many steps ahead, and she wondered if he had just assumed that things would magically fall together once they were on another continent. Shaking her head a little, Serena took the lead down the concourse, knowing that the children would follow after her like ducklings. It wasn't until she saw her name being held up on a tablet that she truly relaxed, and she raised her hand as she made her way over to the man. "Doctor Campbell?"

"Yes, that's me. I also have Cameron and Charlotte Dunn with me, they should be on your manifest as well."

He tapped around on the tablet, nodding a little as he checked off all their names. "All right, are you ready to head to your hotel?"

"Yes."

Before she could say anything else, the driver had taken hold of her suitcase and then grabbed Charlotte's as well. "I'm Shermarke, and I'll be guiding you on your stay here. From the email that was sent to me, I take that you are not here on a pleasure trip?"

"That is the case. My best friend was working with the military and Doctors Without Borders, and apparently there was an incident a few weeks ago, and she was declared missing in action, presumed dead. Her children didn't like the intel that they were given, feeling like there was more to the story than what their family friend had told them. I agreed that we should come and find out more for ourselves. I know that it won't be an easy thing to do, but I'm hoping that we can get a little more closure than what we currently have."

He nodded solemnly, and Serena felt a sudden kinship with the man, as if he knew what it was like to lose someone close to him and that he understood why they had made such a long journey to a different continent. "I heard about that incident. There are still four people who are unaccounted for. Is that why you're heading to the base in a few hours?"

"Yes," she replied as they reached his vehicle. Cameron helped him load the luggage in the boot while she and Charlotte climbed inside. Serena chose to sit in the front of vehicle, since she wanted to continue building a rapport with Shermarke. "Do you mind hanging around the hotel for a few hours whilst we get settled in and changed? I know that you declined the offer of a room there while we are here."

"I live five minutes from the hotel, so I'll just head over as soon as you text me, if you don't mind."

"That will be fine," she replied as he began to drive. "I do have a question, though. Is what I'm currently wearing considered appropriate? I tried to pack conservatively, since I couldn't find too many answers on the internet, and I don't want to offend anyone whilst we're here."

"You look fine, Doctor. But thank you for asking, since there are some people who wouldn't take cultural mores into consideration." Serena relaxed a little as she nodded, relaxing back into the seat and watching the city pass them by as he drove. "All right, here we are. Would you like help with your baggage?"

"No, I think that we have it. But thank you, though. I'll text you in a few hours, when we're ready to head to the base. Though I'll need your number." He nodded and pulled out a business card, giving it to her. "Perfect. We'll see you soon."

Getting out of the vehicle, she waited for Cameron and Charlotte to join her at the front of the vehicle. Cameron managed to get all their bags over to her side, and she grabbed the handle of hers and began to make her way inside, knowing that they would be right behind her. There was a pleasant looking woman standing behind the front desk, and Serena went over to her, a small smile on her lips as she reached her. "Hello, I'm Serena Campbell. I believe that you have two rooms reserved for me?"

The woman gave her a small nod as she typed on the keyboard, and then looked up at her once more. "Yes, however, both rooms only have one bed." Serena glanced back at Cameron and Charlotte, hoping that that wouldn't be an issue for them.

"That will be fine, we're all family, after all," she replied as she dug out her credit card and a copy of her passport, knowing that it would need to be on file. The woman quickly entered her information before giving her credit card back and then handing over two keycards.

"Your rooms are on the fifth floor, at the end of the hallway. If you need anything, please do not hesitate to call down to the front desk, and I'll take care of it."

"Thank you," she murmured before turning and heading over to Cameron and Charlotte. "Let's get on the lift, and then I'll tell you about our next adventure."

Cameron frowned a little as he lifted their bags, Charlotte carrying her own. "What do you mean adventure?" he asked as she pressed the up button on the lift.

"Well, it seems that while there are two rooms available for us, there is only one bed in each room. So…one of us is sharing a bed."

"I'll share with you, Serena. I haven't had to share with my brother since we were babies, and it would feel awkward now." She laughed a little as she nodded in agreement. "Besides, it will be nice to pretend…"

Her words drifted off, and Serena wondered what she had been about to say. Not wanting to pry, she just stepped closer to Charlotte, allowing her to dictate what would happen next. Unsurprisingly, she took hold of Serena's free hand and threaded their fingers together as the lift continued upwards. Finally, they reached the fifth floor, and she stepped out, not letting go of Charlotte's hand as they walked to the end of the hall. "Here, Cam, you take the room next to us, we'll take the one on the corner."

"Fine by me," he replied as he took the keycard from her hand and swiped it in his lock before entering his room.

"He needs to sleep," Charlotte said offhandedly as Serena let them into their room. "Ooh, that is a large bed. I won't have to worry too much about kicking you during the night." Serena chuckled as she brought her bag over to the bed, sinking down onto it before flopping onto her back and staring up at the ceiling. A few moments later, the bed dipped beneath Charlotte's slight weight, and she turned her head to look at the young woman, giving her a questioning look. "He gets short like that when his sleep isn't good, or he hasn't gotten enough. I don't think that he was completely comfortable on the overnight flight like we were. And…what I was going to say in the lift is, well, you're my last connection to my mother, and I just want to be close to you. Because you knew her so well."

"I don't feel like I did."

"You loved her, she loved you. I'd say that you knew her very well. So, in a way, I feel closer to her when I'm near you. Even though she's not here, a piece of her still rests in you." Charlotte turned her face so that she was looking up at the ceiling, reaching out for Serena's hand as she let out a deep sigh. "Do you want to shower first?"

"I think so, yes." Serena squeezed her hand before letting go and sitting up. Opening her suitcase, she rummaged around in it for her toiletries bag and a fresh outfit before going into the bathroom. Setting her things on the sink, she went over to the shower and took a good look at the controls before she got in, knowing that it was likely to be different from her shower at home. Once she was satisfied with the workings of it, she stripped off her clothes and let them fall into a pile on the floor as she stepped into the shower and began to wash the grime of travel from her body, hoping that they could find out what happened to Bernie as quickly as possible. And yet, she knew that she would relish every moment spent with Cameron and Charlotte, growing closer to them as they spent time together in Mogadishu.


End file.
